I believed you. I felt special and set apart.
Your words were intoxicating, like sweet smelling myrrh dripping from your lips. I was mesmerized.
I trusted you. I became a faithful believer.
It was in the way you moved, how you handled matters of the heart and life, how you spoke, your gentleness, attentiveness and compassionate nature.
Nothing mattered anymore, no one but you! You saved me from me. The emptiness, the deep rooted pain disappeared all because of you.
I liked who I had become.
A relationship with you was none like any other I've had. I cherished this relationship...I cherished you.
You knew everything about me...How? It was as if you studied me from conception. WOW!
I was in love and only desired to please you. I wanted....No, I needed you to stay and never leave like the others.
Your love was unconditional...mine was tainted and twisted from the past but because of you I desired to mature in love.
I abandoned myself into your care, trust and love...I abandoned everyone and anything that came between us.
You taught me so much...about myself, life, people, relationships and most of all about love.
Life was absolutely perfect!
When I called upon you, in an instant you were there attending to my every need and desire.
Blessed, I truly was and envied by others.
Then, like a thief in the night, without warning I felt you were disappearing, distancing and silencing yourself from me. Why?
My world was beginning to crumble right under my feet.
I questioned myself...Where did I go wrong? What did I do to anger you?
Everyday I called you, I wrote to you, I even visited your house as if I was a stalker, but no reply, no response…
You had disappeared just like the others.
You broke my heart...just like the others.
I continued searching for you...I cried myself a river and there too you were not to be found.
I couldn't go on without you. I was nothing without you; lost without you...I was deflated without you.
Panic, fear and anxiety consumed me. I tortured myself emotionally. Jealous, I was not but angry you bet I was.
I gave up everything for you!
I felt my soul pinning away. I threw my hands in the air pleading, crying and begging. And then to my surprise you finally decided to respond and answer my endless calls to you.
Without an explanation for your disappearing act you replied "I would never leave you nor forsake you."
In utter dismay yet silently feeling elated, I replied "But why does it feel as if you did, God?"
Ever feel this way when it seems that God has silenced Himself from you? Longing for answers to your prayers, change in your life, change in unfavourable circumstances; you’re told He’s only a breath away but yet it seems He’s no where to be found or near you. You're not alone. However, the truth is He did choose you, you didn't choose Him, He called and appointed you for a purpose and He'll certainly see it to fruition...thus, He'll never you nor forsake you!
May you prosper greatly in every area of your life!
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