Thursday, February 23, 2012

“…You Shoulda Put A Ring On It.” - By Denise Chand

Beyonce meant well when she said “…you shoulda put a ring on it.” Looking back, I’m certain a lot of us are probably happy that he didn’t!  I believe the “Just cried my tears, for three good years” could have been avoided, where you didn’t have to tell him “Don't treat me to the things of the world. I'm not that kind of girl. Your love is what I prefer, what I deserve.” If we don’t love ourselves, how can we expect someone else to love us? If we don’t know what we deserve, how can we expect someone else to give us what we deserve? Crying ourselves a river must come to an end…enough is enough, don’t you think?

All the Single Ladies, before diving into a relationship you first need to APPRECIATE who you are; meaning, maximizing your single status! Who are you? What are your God-given dreams? What’s your God-given purpose? What does the Word of God say about you? Once you’ve come to the true realization of who you are in Christ, you’ll then appreciate yourself and begin to make wise decisions about every area of your life, specifically relationships. You'll function in wisdom rather than emotions/feelings before entering into just any relationship. I've maximized my singleness with the help of the Holy Spirit in knowing who I am - it was a seminal moment when I was awakened to who I am. God has given me big dreams and a purpose, which at times can become overwhelming, but I appreciate who I am and because of this I now make wiser decisions when it comes to relationships rather than being moved by emotions. My emotions waiver so I can't make lifelong decisions based on them! I know God has given you big dreams as well and you were born with a purpose. Refuse to allow wrong/foolish decisions to destroy your dreams and God-given purpose. Appreciating who you are will save you from heartaches, failed relationships and failed marriages…a wedding is by and large cheaper than a divorce. I hear ya, Denise, the one who seems to live in a heart-shaped balloon, but do you know how old I am and how long I’ve been waiting?  First of all, I don’t live in a heart-shaped balloon; I abide in Him, who abides in me…Christ in me is the hope of all glory! Ladies, God knows the plans (many plans) He has for you, they’re plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. So begin to appreciate yourself and appreciate what the Word of God says about you!

I don’t believe in “we can’t help who we fall in love with”. I believe it’s a choice – we choose who we want to love, and therefore enter into a relationship with that person. If you wrap your mind around the aforementioned, you’ll come to understand “appreciating yourself”, and therefore you’ll make wiser choices with whom you enter into a relationship with. Sure, he may dress fine, look fine, smell fine (cologne can intoxicate you to the point that your vision begins to blur, I know…so take a deep breath and exhale!), talk fine but he could be far from fine where your purpose is concerned. Think about what I’m saying!

I'm extending the olive branch to you to bring peace to any inner conflicts you may have regarding relationships or that man who is currently pursuing you. Discover who you are, appreciate yourself (your dreams, your purpose, your integrity, your values, etc.) and then walk in that consciousness and allow wisdom to guide you. Let no person, situation, thing or emotion sway you away from your God-given purpose and dreams -- you’ll regret it when the curtain comes down!

“Many, O LORD my God, are the wonders you have done. The things you planned for us no one can recount to you; were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare.” Psalms 40:5
Maximize your singleness!

God Bless

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